The Ultimate K Pop Diva

Fuck BoA, Utada and Ayumi. In my mind the ultimate Asian diva will always be Mina. No other bitch even comes close to matching the grace, poise and unparalleled trashiness of my Korean angel. Mina's nude photos transcend cultural barriers and her shameless publicity whoring is an inspiration to an entire generation. That's not even mentioning Mina's amazing string of stunning pop flops! Quite simply, this divine being is a beacon of light sent down from the heavens to entertain and guide us. Think of her as a mix of Dannii and Bionda with a twist of Melissa Tkautz for extra flavour. Yes, she really is that fierce! Here are ten irrefutable reasons why you should bow down and worship at the feet of this glorious diva.

1. Mina was discovered at the 2002 World Cup - wearing a Korean flag, a red bandanna and nothing else. Her luminous beauty caught the eye of the media and her photo was beamed around the world. As a result she became an overnight celebrity in Korea and somehow blagged a record deal.

2. Unfortunately, Mina's first single ("Answer The Phone") and debut album flopped miserably. Many dismissed the Korean beauty as a flash in the pan but she had other ideas.

3. Critics had to eat their words when Mina re-emerged in 2004 and actually scored a hit! "Turn Around" became something of an anthem and signalled Mina's move towards an urban pop sound. However, just when things were starting to look up, reports began circulating in the media that Mina didn't actually sing all the vocals on her second album and she left (ie. was dumped by) her record company.

4. The resilient diva bounced back again in 2006 by scoring a new record deal with EMI. She tried to use their international contacts to crack the European market with a pseudo cover of Holly Valance's "Kiss Kiss" but sadly no one was interested. Personally, I love Mina's version and desperately wish I could find a copy.

5. Mina then returned to Korea and released her third album. The lead single "Fly High" is a fabulous slice of electronic disco that Kylie or Madonna would be glad to call their own but, typically, it flopped. I hope Mina returns to this sound because "Fly High" is divine.

6. In the most desperate attempt to generate publicity in recent history, Mina releases a nude calender "to inspire Korea's athletes".

7. Questions are raised in the media about Mina's real age. She originally claimed to be in her 20s but eventually confesses to being 36!

8. Mina makes yet another comeback in late 2007 with her 4th album "Minastacia". Her sound and image (which basically involves wearing as few clothes as possible) are heavily influenced by urban pop and she hires female rapper Ak'sent to sing on the insanely catchy single "Look". The song and video are both brilliant and well worth checking out.

9. Mina doesn't let middle age stop her from posing in a school uniform on the cover of her amazing single "좋아" (above)!

10. The scandals continue in 2008 when Mina appears on the Chinese equivalent of "Dancing With The Stars" and gets 0 from all three judges for disrespecting the show and the audience! It seems her slutastic dance moves were too much for conservative China.

I have no doubt Mina will bounce back better than ever in 2009 - hopefully with a sizzling new album and some kind of porn scandal. She might not have the best voice in the business or the hottest producers but she's got style, attitude and charisma to burn. Mina, I love you!

My Failed Asian Pop Festival

So I had this great idea a couple of weeks ago. Bored and repulsed by just about everything on Australian radio, I decided to devote my blog to the only region currently churning out great pop music with any regularity - Asia. The plan was pretty simple. I would hold a month long Asian pop festival featuring a selection of my favourite Japanese and Korean acts. I knew it would turn off a lot of readers but I've never let that stop me in the past. The first step was supposed to be easy. I needed a glamorous new banner to herald my brief transformation and reasoned that nobody represents Asian appreciation better than Miley Cyrus. In retrospect, it probably wasn't my wisest decision. The intention was to take the piss out Miley-gate (and rail against militant political correctness in the process) but I ran the design (above) by my Vietnamese BFF, who advised me against it - after she had finished laughing.

After binning Miley, I settled on something more inclusive and universal - smut. My second attempt at a new banner would simply feature some random dude wearing as little as possible. Easy, right? I thought so too before wading through a small mountain of porn to find an image that was sleazy without being too lewd. Do an unfiltered Google search for "Hot Asian Guys" to see what I mean! The final product (above) wasn't going to win me any awards but I was reasonably happy with it. On a whim, I decided to run it by a different friend who remarked that it looked like "a poster for a Thai sex holiday". Charming. By that stage my enthusiasm for the whole concept had started to wane. Everyone I had mentioned it to expressed a distinct lack of interest and somewhere along the way it all just became too hard, so I canned the idea altogether. Despite the fact that my Asian pop festival was a massive flop before it even started, it hasn't affected my love for the music. So instead of devoting an entire month to the genre, I'm simply going to feature Asian pop stars more regularly - starting with the Queen of Japanese dance (and Kylie's #1 fan) Ami Suzki.

I've written more about Ami than any other Japanese pop star on this blog. It's no exaggeration to say that she's one of my very favourite divas making music today. Her past two albums have been sublime and I'm still working on reviewing her latest opus "Supreme Show". That post will happen (I hope) but in the meantime, Ami has gone and recorded new music for an upcoming greatest hits compilation. Her new song "Reincarnation" was released in Japan this week and it represents a radical change in sound. No surprise given the absence of her usual producer Yasutaka Nakata (the current king of Japanese techno-pop). It took me some time to get into "Reincarnation", and while I still think it lacks the grandeur of "Free Free" or "One", it's nevertheless a great pop song. M-Flo's production is heavier and less melodic but there's no denying the originality on display. I just think the track needs a good edit. At close to 6 minutes, "Reincarnation" sounds more like an extended club mix than a pop song. Happily, the video clip (below) is something of a triumph. Ami looks lovely, the photography is gorgeous and there can be no claims of plagiarism this time around. Enjoy!

The Wonder Girls

If I had to choose a theme song for January 2008 it would be a close call between Kylie's "Wow" and "Tell Me" by the Wonder Girls. While Dannii's sister and an obscure Korean girlband would initially appear to have little in common, both songs constitute a three and a half minute trip to pure pop heaven. I expect pop perfection from a Minogue but the magnificence of the Wonder Girls comes as a wonderful surprise.

I've always been slightly wary of Asian pop. As a general rule, I prefer my music in a language I can understand or at least vaguely follow. Then, there are the incredibly annoying J-Pop loons that pollute most music forums. As far as I'm concerned, anyone who can contribute to an Ayumi vs Utada debate most likely has an altar to the dark prince in their bedroom. Despite these considerable hurdles, I've found myself becoming increasingly fascinated by the Asian pop scene thanks to the expert guidance of my friend Nori, who has kindly introduced me to a cavalcade of fabulous acts - including the Wonder Girls.

A manufactured girlband with five members between the ages of 15 and 19, the Wonder Girls strike me as South Korea's answer to the Spice Girls - only with better hair and the ability to dance. The Wonder Girls hit it big with "Tell Me", an unfathomably catchy jam that topped the Korean sales chart for 7 weeks and went on to become the biggest hit of 2007. It's easy to see the appeal. "Tell Me" is undoubtedly a work of pop genius. From the clever sampling of Stacey Q's "Two Of Hearts" to the catchy chorus, the song stands out as an instant classic. Make sure you check out the fabulous video clip (below). The dance routine has become a phenomenon of its own in South Korea and the scene where the girls beat up a flasher belongs in the Pop Trash hall of fame!

Even if you usually steer well clear of foreign pop, take a chance on the Wonder Girls. "Tell Me" is one of those rare songs that transcends language.