Engelbert Humperdinck's Dance Album

I've decided to interrupt my recent posting spree of new Australian pop music to worship an album that has long been close to my heart. I don't think anyone will mind. If the overwhelming silence that greeted my posts on Cosima, Amy & Co is any indication, I assume you think they are a bunch of useless cunts anyway. And you could well be right. The same, however, can not be said for the subject of this post. Engelbert Humperdinck is a true legend (or so my mother tells me) and his dance album is one of the most delicious pop trash offerings of the last decade. Make no mistake, this album is cheesier than an unwashed cock dipped in fondue!

The most remarkable thing about Engelbert's dance experiment is the fact that the album is actually rather brilliant. Released in 1998, when Engelbert was a mere 62 years old, "The Dance Album" appears to be one of the first attempts to jump on Cher's "Believe" bandwagon. However, Engelbert's comeback as the undisputed king of the dancefloor took a slightly different approach. Firstly, he employed Chris Cox and Barry Harris to produce the whole album. Those names should be familiar to club queens because they are otherwise known as Thunderpuss and released a series of brilliant remixes for the likes of Whitney, Madonna and Britney in the late 1990s.

The album also differentiates itself from the other geriatric dance albums by mostly comprising of new, gayed-up versions of old hits. The dance re-makes of "Release Me" and "A Man Without Love" are truly sublime, while I never miss the opportunity to stun and amaze my guests by playing the glorious disco version of "The Last Waltz"! In addition revitalising several classic Humperdinck hits, the Thunderpuss boys also contribute four new songs. All of the new tunes make me moist but "Am I The Lover" is a craptastic masterpiece! Who wouldn't want to be serenaded by sexy Engelbert singing this anthem?! It's easy to dismiss "The Dance Album" as a gimmick or a tragic grasp for relevance by a fading star. However, it's much harder to ignore the album's enormous appeal or the overwhelming sense of fun that shines through each and every song.

"The Dance Album" can be purchased cheaply from Amazon and regularly turns up on Ebay.