La Toya & Cerrone - Oops, Oh No!

I wish I never got out of bed today. From the moment I woke up, everything that could go wrong did go wrong - until about 5 minutes ago when something miraculous happened. I was moping around, drowning my sorrows and generally feeling sorry for myself when La Toya's amazing duet with Cerrone popped up on my iPod shuffle. It was as if I had been touched by an extremely fabulous angel. Through the power of her stunning 1986 flop, Goddess Toy reached out to me in my hour of need and made everything seem alright. This post is written in her honour.

There isn't a lot of information about "Oops, Oh No!", which is surprising given the high profile of Toy Toy's duet partner. Cerrone is a living legend, having been one of the most influential musicians of the entire disco movement - bagging 5 Grammy Awards and selling over 30 million records. I guess La Toya was hoping Cerrone's Midas touch would rub off on her but in true Toy fashion, it didn't. The single was released hot on the heels of her 4th album, "Imagination", and suffered a similar fate, failing to chart anywhere. It's a shame because "Oops, Oh No!" is an absolute gem. From the opening pan pipe sound effects (on the LP Version at least), the track unfolds as a weird and wonderful slice of experimental pop music circa 1986. Synths collide with urban beats against a dazzling electronic back drop to create a burst of instant happiness. The lyrics are really secondary to the music but the chorus is very cute and I love the way that Toy's voice completely overshadows Cerrone's. However, my favourite bit is the toygasmic scream at the two minute mark. Bliss! Confusingly, the edits are all radically different but my favourite is the LP Version and that's the mix I have streaming:

Oops, Oh No!


"Oops, Oh No!" was given a second chance at life five years after its initial release when the song was re-issued in Holland - without Cerrone's vocals! In fact, the Dutch version basically bins the entire song apart from the chorus, which is roughly placed over a fairly uninspiring house track. Amazingly, it became one of Toy's only hits - climbing all the way to #30 on the Dutch club charts! I vastly prefer the original but this has some nice moments including a classy piano solo. Words can't adequately express how much I miss La Toya. May she return from reality TV hell to further enrich our lives with her own unique brand of musical genius in the not too distant future.